Port Aransas

This weeekend, Andy and I took a much-anticipated trip to the beach! We needed to get the road trip started off right. A pound of Rudy's moist brisket did the trick!

Makes me hungry just looking at it!

We got to Port A somewhere around 11:45 and were stressed that we would miss the ferry. We missed the Swan Quarter ferry when we were in the OBX last year, and it was not a fun experience. Little did we know, this ferry was a much shorter ride AND it runs 24-7. Here you see the lights of Port Aransas as the ferry crosses over.

Palm trees at our motel- the Captain's Quarters. Which sadly I cannot say that I recommend. We've got our eye on the Tarpon Inn for our next visit.

But I can recommend Bundy's for breakfast. Great food and terrific coffee. We stopped in both Saturday and Sunday morning for some food and a cup o' joe.

I LOVE packing for the beach. I brought everything we could conceivably need for a day of fun in the sun.

Andy pre-sunburn.

Sun and a book. Yes, please.

More good eats came at dinner when we made our second visit to Port Aransas Brewing Company. We went there last August after Andy's water jump in Corpus Christi. That trip made us decide we had to come back! We've fallen for their crab-stuffed jalapeno poppers. Dip those bad boys in some Ranch dressing to curb your appetite after a day of fun in the sun.

Notice the contrast of Andy's skin tone to the "Daily Brew". Red much? I have no idea how this boy burns so bad! He stayed under the umbrella and put on sunscreen! What am I going to do with him? ;-)

Sunday was a day for kayaking and fishing. We stopped at Port A Outfitters for some bait.

This kitty lives at Port A Outfitters and knows how to take it easy. ;)

We left the island mid-morning and after the short ferry ride, headed to the Lighthouse Lakes Trails. They're kayaking trails. Leave it to me and Andy to find a trail to exhaust ourselves on when we're supposed to be relaxing!

Andy tried his hand at catching some fish, but after getting skunked for about 45 minutes, we decided to take a yak trip to the Port Aransas Lighthouse. We passed by these birds on the way. Sorry it's so hard to see them. The app I used to take these pics doesn't allow me to zoom.

The Port A Light is apparently still functional, but it's only accessible by water. (I think) We passed by with our yaks. Across the channel from the Lighthouse is an uninhabited island that we read was supposed to be great for shelling. Of course, we had to go, but crossing the channel was no joke. It made me think of our other crazy yak trip to Aqua-Palooza....

When we got to the island, we were really surprised to meet this hare! Can you see him just to the left of the bush in the center? Again, no zoom and he wouldn't let me get very close to him before he started to hop away.

But this little crab let us get much closer!

Andy saw the crab in his hole and provoked him to come out with a stick!

After our trip to the shell island (which had more trash than shells, but we did find a few good ones!), Andy tried his luck at fishing again. He caught this little guy not once, not twice, but three times while fishing near the Lighthouse. (By the way, Andy's version of this fishing tale is that he caught three separate small catfish... but I beg to differ)

After paddling for miles and being out in the sun for hours, we decided to call it quits. But not until Andy had a chance to put his line in at a little cove we found on our way toward the lighthouse. Sure enough, he finally caught one of the little jumping fish that had been taunting him all afternoon. We didn't end up with anything worth taking home, but at least he felt a little bit vindicated. And we did get our seafood. We just had to stop and order it at a restaurant on the way home. :)

Summer Style

Welcome to the Wermels' apartment. The look has been updated for the summer. I wanted a lighter, brighter, simpler style for summer. So I spent the first few days of my summer break running around to places like Target, Lowe's and Hobby Lobby, which was not relaxing, but now I think we're in good shape to kick back and enjoy the rest of the summer!

I wore this floppy hat around while shopping...along with some old khakis, and my "I wasn't born in the mountains, but I got here as fast as I could" t-shirt. Cute. ;)

Ready for some fun in the sun!

I keep the shells Andy & I collect each summer. Hopefully we'll make some more additions after this weekend's trip to Port Aransas!

It's hard to see here, but the picture by the door is a print Andy & I picked up on last summer's trip to Yosemite. It shows a flyfisherman in the Merced river at the base of El Capitan. Love.

Improvements were made to the collage. I actually pulled out the ruler this time! Gats is a sweet addition, I think.

Birds-eye view

Arthur the arthropod. A treasure I got in Pennsylvania when I visited Alissa & Dan a few years back.

Perfectly Normal Saturday

 After such a busy year of school, soccer, BSF and Kidstuff, Andy and I are taking some time to just hang out. But before the relaxing and summer fun can officially begin, we needed to be able to access our summer toys- camping equipment, beach chairs, kayaking stuff, etc. Everything was literally piled in the garage. So this weekend, our chore was to clean out the garage. It was sort of tough work, at times, but we enjoyed just having a normal Saturday at home- no drill or papers or games or anything. I realize how totally normal and unexciting this all is, but we used to take pictures all the time and never do anymore. So I figured I'd try to get back in the habit- even in the ordinary...

 We went to Goodwill and picked up these two "heinously ugly" pool blue cabinets for $12. They actually work perfect for housing Andy's wide variety of oils and cleaners he uses to work on the cars.

 What Saturday is complete without a trip to Lowe's? We got some stuff for the garage and I got a Bouganvilla plant.

 And what trip to Lowe's is complete without a visit to the hot dog stand? Hot dogs at Lowe's always remind me of my friend Hannah. She introduced me to the glory that is a Lowe's hot dog. :)

 After Lowe's we went to Sears to get Andy a rolling cart for his tools, but we stopped at the Farmer's Market that sets up every Saturday at Lakeline Mall afterwards and got some local produce.

 Andy was fascinated by this guy who was sharpening knives at the Farmer's Market.

 Before we got down to business in the garage, we took the doggies to "Yappy Hour" at our apartment complex. Really it was just a grand opening of the new dog park, but the doggies had fun. :)

 Makin' progress...

 The ugly blue cabinets work great for storage and will be a work space for Andy, as well. Notice his new cart beside them. He's super excited about it. :)

And this white cabinet was left by the dumpster, so I snagged it to keep our camping equipment. Now I don't have to dig through a plastic bin to find something. Hopefully we'll get a camping trip in sometime this summer... 

Andy is pondering what to order while we wait for a table.

 Our reward to ourselves after a hard day's work was a trip to Macaroni Grill. I got some gift certificates from students/co-workers so we had ourselves a feast!

 Keeping myself entertained while waiting on our appetizer.... I drew a picture of my new plant.

 And Andy drew a picture of his beloved- our 1987 Jeep!

We ate up pretty much everything. A good ending to a perfectly normal Saturday.

A chasing after the wind...

Well, in answer to my previous question on my last post- yes, I suppose it is (sort of) summer. :) The last day of school was Thursday, and though we had in-service yesterday and through Tuesday of next week, we are, for most intents and purposes, done.

Thursday afternoon was the high school boat party on Lake Travis, and I spent four hours watching my students skip rocks and eat hot dogs- still not sure where Nicole put the three that she ate... and slide down the slide linked together at the elbows. It was a fun moment in the sun that perfectly reflected something that I learned in church on Sunday.

Andy and I visited Hill Country Bible Church for the first time on Sunday morning. After a couple of years at the Austin Stone, we feel like God might be calling us to find a different community of believers. Doubt I'll write about the reasons for that, but I do want to just affirm for anyone who is reading that we just feel like God has fellowship for us elsewhere. We aren't angry or upset with the church and we're truly thankful for all that God has used the Austin Stone to teach us because- it's been a lot! But we are growing up, and feel the need for change- and well, that's about all that needs to be said.

Anyway, we went to HCBC on Sunday to check it out. We're really on the search for community and I know from experience that Hill Country does community well- at least I know that the school does.  That has been so satisfying for my heart this year, that we thought we would check out the church, as well.

Quick side-story on that, because it's funny- but then I'll get back to my point. So, while Andy was in Utah for National Guard for the month of April, I felt like God was reminding of my need to let him be the leader in our marriage- especially spiritually. And so while I was feeling the need for change in the area of our church community, I also knew that I needed to let Andy lead. On the three minute drive over to HCBC on Sunday morning, we prayed and asked God to direct us and that He would use our time at HCBC that morning to give us some wisdom about where He wants us to fellowship and worship Him with other believers. And in my heart, I was silently thinking about how I wanted His help to follow Andy's lead. Well, we got inside the sanctuary, and Andy had my hand. I went for some seats over on the side, but Andy literally led me by the hand to a row that was more central. He didn't realize it at the time, but he led us right in front of a row of my students! I was stunned and humored by God's sense of humor, especially when, in unison, three of them said, "Mrs. Wermer!" No, that's not a typo- they really call me Wermer, and MerWer and also, when I'm in a good mood, MerBear- long story. Anyway, I thought it was a sweet reminder of the reasons that God brought me to HCCS- those kids- and maybe an indication of how He might be developing those relationships even further by bringing us together for church, as well. We'll see.

Anyway, the service on Sunday morning was about Ecclesiastes, and it couldn't have been more timely. Tim Hawks, the head pastor at HCBC talked about Solomon's pursuit of pleasure and did an excellent job explaining what his pursuits actually meant. If you're familiar with the book of Ecclesiastes, then you know that Solomon was David's son through his marriage to Bathsheba, and that he, at the beginning of his reign, asked God for wisdom, and God granted it to him. Well, I guess the richness of his mind might have been part of the reason that he went on a life-long quest for meaning, which he recorded in Ecclesiastes. Maybe if Solomon had been simple-minded he wouldn't have had such a desire, but, in any case, his wisdom certainly expressed itself in a pretty systematic approach to searching for meaning. He tried everything- all of the variables- which makes him a pretty good scientist, by the way. But in the end, he found that most everything was "meaningless, a chasing after the wind."

On Sunday, Tim talked about the search for pleasure leading to that same meaninglessness, and, as I said before, it could not have been more timely. Tim pointed out that having fun and doing things that satisfy the senses- does not mean that it is necessarily bad. And that we should enjoy these things- they are a gift from God. But that they are their own reward. There's nothing more to get out of them than what you are able to enjoy with your eyes, ears, touch, taste, etc. This was a great lesson for me heading into the summer because, as I wrote about in the previous blog, I have really been building up the summer in my mind. And that some of that build up is centered around activities that will satisfy the senses. Tim's lesson reminded me that it's okay to enjoy those things- as long as they are not sinful- it's good to feel the sun on my skin and to cook and eat a good meal. I'll love hearing the waves lap the shore at Part Aransas next weekend and will delight in being reunited with my friends and family when I get back to North Carolina. But they are their own reward. That's what I was thinking about during the boat party. There we all were- students & teachers- soaking up the sun, splashing in the water, and it was fun. But it was its own reward.

Yesterday's in-service gave me the desire to seek out the next lesson from Ecclesiastes for myself- although I think I might be hooked on Tim's Ecclesiastes series and will be back for this Sunday's lesson. Reason being that, even though we've finished with 2011-2012, one day of in-service was enough to get me excited about 2012-2013. I left with drive, desire and not just a little bit of anxiety about how to tweak my lesson plans and the things that I would need to improve and create this summer. I kept going on and on about it when I got home, which must have devastated Andy, who is ready to have his wife back, at least for the few months when school does not have to be so consuming. But my mind was so busy that I couldn't even stay asleep. A little after 1AM, I went into the study and pulled out Ecclesiastes. I knew that after pursuing pleasure, Solomon pursued work- and I needed to read what he had to say about his quest. I paused and wrote down this part in my journal-

Their days of labor are filled with pain and grief. Even at night they cannot rest. Ecclesiastes 2:23


It was one of those rare moments when you know you're living a Bible verse. Solomon hit the nail on the head. Even after a year filled with moments of work-induced pain and grief, I still couldn't sleep because in my mind, I was still working. So I got to thinking, work is good. Just like sensual pleasure can be good. They are gifts from the Lord. But they are their own reward. Another thing that Tim brought up about pursuing pleasure, and I find this to be true of work too- both leave you with a continual hunger for more. More fun. More money. More accomplishments. More knowledge. As Solomon said, "a chasing after the wind..."

So now what? Pleasure is only worth the moment we enjoy it, and will leave me hungry for more. Work will drain me, and even when times of rest come, I won't be able to enjoy them, yet I'll feel the need to continue to produce. What's to be done? I've searched a couple of places in Scripture this morning, looking for an answer, and Deuteronomy 6 stood out. Deuteronomy 6 says that we need to do three things. Love, fear, and serve the Lord. These are the real things. The things that mean something. The things we can chase- and actually will actually satisfy.

So summer- at last we meet- and there will be some good times, there will be some work to do, but I'm hoping that in all of that, there will be a chasing after love, fear and service to the Lord. I'm not sure what that looks like or means, but I've got two and a half months to try to figure it out.

Is it summer yet?

Sometime in the 6 o'clock hour this morning, I woke up from a dream about slathering Hydrochloric Acid onto a fetal pig and watching the flesh dissolve from the chemical burn. As my thoughts marched steadily toward consciousness, I began trying to answer the questions to the thermochemistry take-home test in my mind- only to come up frustrated because my mind can't even calculate tip at a restaurant, much less solve for an unknown final temperature. I eventually gave up and came into the study, only to become distracted by an article from BBC News about viruses being used to harness energy. About halfway through the article, I opened the tab to blogger and decided to stage my own intervention. Enough science. It's time for summer.

 This school year has been very full. Three new preps, essentialy. I've made dozens of powerpoints, graded hundreds of papers, and received my fair share of stressful parent emails. Since spring break, I've been almost obsessed with the thought of summer. I've thought about places I'd like to travel, and dreamed about reading by the pool or getting up for coffee and breakfast, just to snuggle back into bed with Gatsby & Daisy for the rest of the morning. But these past couple of weeks, as things have actually begun to wind down somewhat- I've been more focused on real rest. I feel like I've run a long race, and haven't stopped for water and fuel often enough. I have been so driven by my task list this year- so determined to do a good job and avoid criticism, that I have treated my relationship with God (not to mention my relationships with other people) as an afterthought, and I'm grieved by this- and completely exhausted. There've been so many mornings when I've risen in the early hours, spent a few minutes in God's Word, trying to get my BSF lesson done, and then quickly dived into a stack of papers to grade or a powerpoint that I needed to make for that day's lesson. Then even those few minutes faded, and it was straight into the work- hours and hours of work, with little thought of God.

 I was saying to Andy last night, that here at the end, I find myself with a USB drive full of achievements, and an empty heart. I miss the fullness of God's love, and that's really what I'm looking forward to the most this summer- spending time getting re-acclimated to the love that God has promised to always have for me. At the same time, I'm humbled by how much I don't deserve it- because I've consciously chosen to put my desire to "do" and "perform" above my desire to know and serve and remain devoted to Him this year. I lay that burden down at the cross and claim the grace I will never deserve.

 Two more weeks at school remain. There will still be some grades and some tests and some ceremonies to go, but I am trying to draw closer to the Lord each day, and maybe by the time the summer gets here, I'll be familiar with Him again, and that truly is something to be excited about.

Why I'm no longer friends with Facebook

Last week, I did something drastic. I deactivated my Facebook account. So this week, since I have some time, I thought I'd give an account of why I no longer have an account with what my friend Danielle calls the "Book of Face."

I spend a lot of time on a daily basis talking to teenage girls about who they are in Christ. Last year, I tried writing a book about identity in Christ. And yet, security in the Lord- in my position as His daughter, His servant, His friend- is still a struggle for me.

I'm beginning to see that struggle differently- that much is true. I no longer see the great failures of these past few years with despair- I see them as God's way of doing a necessary surgery on my heart, so that He could expose my craving for man's approval, and ultimately cut it out and replace it with a desire for His approval alone. And God used Facebook to accomplish that painful work. There have been words and images and messages shared over Facebook over the past few years that have caused conflict and pain in my life and have drastically affected my relationships with a handful of people.

Deactivating Facebook is not an effort to run away from those problems. But I have been facing my need for approval, and all of the ugly that has come with it face to face for quite some time now. One of the things that God has done, is help me love and forgive people who have not approved of me. So running away from them isn't really what's going on. But the greater work that God has done it to give me a desire to be who He has called me to be, and do the work that He has called me to do.

I heard a story on the radio the other day about a girl who chose not to look at herself in the mirror for a year. She did this because she struggled so much with seeing herself as a woman of worth and value in the Lord. She saw herself only in comparison with what the world says about beauty. Every time she looked in the mirror, she felt like a failure, like what God had created could not compare with what the world demanded. This is how I feel about Facebook. God has made a lot of progress in my heart over the past few years, but so far I've mostly just identified the struggle. Now it's time to respond to what He has revealed.

I've noticed that I can be having a pretty good day, can be dwelling in contentment with my work, my life- and then I'll go on Facebook- and I see images of everyone else's life in front of my eyes. And I compare. And comparison is the thief of joy. What's bizarre is that the things I see are not necessarily things I desire, but there's something about seeing post after post of everyone's mini-kingdom that brings feelings of frustration and discontent. I feel ugly and unimportant, like the girl did when she looked in the mirror, and the feeling stays until I sign off. Then, I look around, the sun in shining, I have a lesson to plan to write or someone to contact- and I remember that my life is blessed and purposeful after all.

I'm not saying that Facebook is bad in and of itself. It's no worse than that mirror was, but it was something that Satan used as a tool against that girl- to convince her that what God had made was not good enough. And he's making out like a bandit with me and Facebook. I've decided to stop, even though it means that I won't be able to see other people's life updates on a regular basis, and I won't be able to update about mine. But that's just the thing- I honestly feel like Facebook has not helped me really connect with anyone. I've disconnected from a few people because of Facebook interactions, but I don't know that I've actually gotten any closer... some people might have different stories, but this one is mine.

So, bye-bye Facebook- for a while at least. I'm focusing on what God has called me to do and who He has made me to be. I'm going to try to believe, and I mean really and truly believe- what I was writing about last year- that I have value because He loves me. That I am completely forgiven and free from past sins. That I have a purpose, and that no one's status update should make me question that.

Just as a final note- I know that there are some people who use Facebook as a tool to help glorify God and encourage others. I know that some people have used it to encourage me! These opinions are not at all applied to everyone else that I know, but are meant to convey my own weakness and my desire to see the Lord's strength change my life in this area.