Today, I'm thankful for my little boy. It's amazing how, just when you think your heart couldn't get any fuller, God unfolds a part that you didn't know was even there.
When I was pregnant with Story, I somehow "knew" her. I felt like I understood her personality, even when she was inside me. When she arrived, she was just what I expected- only now I could see her and hold her.
It wasn't like that with Grey. I don't really know why. I kept saying to Andy throughout the pregnancy that I didn't really know Grey yet. I didn't know what to expect when he got here. And the first few days of his life were so challenging for me because of the anxiety I experienced immediately after his birth that I did not feel the immediate connection with him that I had with Story.
But today, I am grateful for the way each sigh, coo, smile and cry tethers my heart to him. I'm grateful for the sweetness that oozes out of my new little person. I'm grateful that when I smell the top of his head, it smells like me- a smell I'm not even consciously aware of, but, when I nuzzle him up to my nose, assures me that he is irrefutably mine.
Every day, I tell Grey, "You are important." I want him to know that even though he was my second ray of sunshine, his light was no less bright.
I love you, Andrew Grey. And I am grateful for you.
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