I haven't been writing much because I've been writing a lot. On my book, that is. I've also been interviewing for a job and tutoring- but who cares about that right now? It's Easter!
Easter is my favorite day of the year, and I'll try to post some pics later of today's events. But I am about to burst for joy, and so of course I had to write to get it out or I'm going to swim out of the Erwin Center after Austin Stone's service in a river of my own joy-filled tears. Already this morning, I started crying while folding some laundry and singing the part of Wonderful, Merciful Savior that says, "You are the One that I praise, You are the One I adore." My voice cracked on adore and I was on the floor face down crying and just thanking Jesus. I would probably still be there but the timer dinged telling me that the second of today's hashbrown casseroles was finished in the oven. (We're having a huge crowd for lunch today!)
Anyway, here's why I am so outrageously joyful this morning- because I am approved of. This past year, while writing Snapshots and just living life, I've discovered a HUGE approval idolatry in my life. God graciously revealed this through allowing me to- go figure- not be approved of. It broke my heart. But what joy to have spent the past couple of weeks contemplating and writing about something I completely missed in the chapter of Snapshots about Jesus as the Bread of Life.
It's here- John 6:27- On him (Jesus) God has placed his seal of approval. I've been meditating on this verse for days. When the reminders of how some still greatly disapprove of me come up, I have prayed this verse from the depth of my heart. Jesus! I believe in you! I am made new in you! And in you, I find the approval of our Father!
So this morning, my devotion in Utmost said, "Never seek after anything other than the approval of God." I have tried so hard, worked so hard but man's approval alludes me. What a burden lifted every time I am reminded that I do not have to work for man's approval but God's alone (and I do need to be reminded!) But listen to the rest of the devotion- "always be willing to go outside the camp, bearing His reproach." Not only should I be willing to face the reproach of man, I should expect it. To walk where Christ walked, the road gets narrow and rough and people mock and spit and abuse. So the fact that approval alludes me is a good indication that I'm walking in the dust of my Rabbi.
But never mind suffering today. Today is Resurrection Day! And that's what had me crying on the floor. Because the great relief that Truth brings overwhelms me today. I am approved. I don't have to wait on that. Right now, today, because of Jesus Christ I am approved by Almighty God and it doesn't matter who doesn't like me or want me here- I am Abba's girl. And no body can take that away from me.
For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. Colossians 3:3